How Deep Do You Go?
By Susan Mercedes. Filed in Friends, Life |
We all have different styles. Styles in our hair, clothes, communication, whatever.
However, there are only two ways to communicate which I define as snorkeling and scuba diving.
Snorkeling involves light conversations that skim the service. Snorkelers often have brief, upbeat discussions with very little depth. The topics are covered in lightening speed and often involve such things as the weather, cute outfits, menu items, weekend plans, to do list items, etc. Snorkelers can do it in large groups or in a more intimate setting.
Scuba diving involve deep dive discussions. The pace of these discussions are usually much slower than snorkeling. Although they are often discussed with much more passion and conviction. Topics may include politics, purpose in life, repeated relationship failures, etc. The topics would generally hit the core of our being. Scuba diving discussions are generally conducted between two people.
I’m a snorkeler. I skim the surface. I cover one zillion topics if we engage in a discussion. Occasionally I scuba dive. This can be exhausting to me. The topics are more serious and can be stressful. But there is much more satisfaction when you connect with another person on a deeper level.
What is your preference…a snorkel or a scuba dive?
Tags: communication, discussions, Friends, topics
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 at 8:44 am
Light and easy conversations are a relief to me, because most of my interaction with friends tends to be deeper – politics almost always come up. But, every once in a while, I go out to dinner with a friend or something, and that “girly” talk about hair and clothes is a breath of fresh air!
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 5:54 am
Misty:Cheers to snorkeling!
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 at 8:46 am
I love your analogy! I tend to be a snorkeler with the masses, a scuba diver with a select few (like you!). It’s just my personality to remain private and keep personal things close to the vest. I often don’t go to the deep stuff because I find it kind of exhausting. PLUS how much more fun is it to talk about clothes and cocktails?
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 5:59 am
Laura: In the rare cases where my ADD isn’t full blown or I’m not too saucy, I like scuba dives. And with you, they are always a pleasure.
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 at 11:37 am
I’m a scuba diver. I’m awkward at snorkeling and often suck in water and choke. Then again I suck at scuba diving also. I’m a hermit crab.
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 6:00 am
Carrie: This surprises me about you. As long as you don’t pinch me (hermit crabs pinch, right?) I’m happy to hang out with you in the water…however you’d like.
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 at 1:51 pm
I used to be a hermit crab too (notice how we added a third communication to your blog? LOL) but now I’m pretty much like you, I snorkel for the most part and only occasionaly scuba and when I do scuba, the intensity of the conversations tend to sort of emotionally drain me. However, when it comes to snorkeling with a guy I like, I drown immediately. Hate that about myself!
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 6:01 am
Amberly: Drowning sucks. I suggest drinking more wine. Cheers.
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 at 4:19 pm
I like to do a variety of both. I think the majority of my friends are all snorkelers so I am good at floating around at their pace. But occasionally, when there is something deep down that needs to be discussed, I like to put on my scuba gear. Great analogy!
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 6:03 am
Summer: It’s great to be able to do both. Water sports are fun! Wait, uhm…human interaction is the fun thing.
Tuesday, April 28th 2009 at 10:56 pm
Scuba, mostly. That’s how I get to hear people’s insane stories. But if I have a glass of Jameson in hand, I just hug people a lot and accidentally spit on them as I babble away about how much I love the tuba player in Blood, Sweat & Tears. I don’t know if that’s snorkeling or scuba diving, but it’s definitely a water sport of some kind.
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 6:06 am
Erin: No, that’s just plain fun! *pouring you a glass of Jameson*
Wednesday, April 29th 2009 at 3:19 pm
Very interesting analogy. But where does the Surfer fit in? That’s what I am. Surfing usually involves light skimming of the surface conversation until I end up becoming so flustered by the pressures of social interaction that I crash the wave and end up slamming into the merciless coral below leaving me beaten up and with a broken board.
Susan Mercedes Reply:
April 30th, 2009 at 6:19 am
Porty: I definitely need to add surfing to the mix. Well not the crashing and broken board part, but the idea. In fact, surfing is like snorkeling except you’re using a board as the tool to help you get through conversations. Let’s pretend that the board represents alcohol. If you rely on the “board” too much, you’ll inevitably pass out. End of story.
Thursday, April 30th 2009 at 4:52 pm
Great analogy, Susan! I think I tend to snorkel for the most part, but I enjoy scuba as well, with people I’m close too. What is always surprising to me are the random strangers who have just met me and take me on a sudden deep sea dive. No prep time, no air tank, just wham! Here I am in an emotionally draining conversation, but I can’t turn away, I feel like they have ’shared’ something with me and I can’t abandon them.
Susan Mercedes Reply:
May 1st, 2009 at 7:51 am
LadyXanth: I love that you can’t “abandon” people after they insist on taking you on a scuba dive. You’re sweet like that.
Friday, May 1st 2009 at 6:23 am
I’m totally a scuba diver. All the interesting stuff is well below the surface. Though I like diving with the “board”. How does that work?
Susan Mercedes Reply:
May 1st, 2009 at 7:53 am
Chris: The rules belong to us. Take your “board” scuba diving anytime! Hell, the “board” makes life so much easier at breakfast.