Wino Wednesday: Jello Will Change My Life
By Susan Mercedes. Filed in Drinks, Food, Friends, Life |
This Wino Wednesday post was inspired by eating alcohol.
I think I found the way to live life to the fullest. It involves Jello shots. In fact the entire plan revolves around them. Here’s how I’m doing it:
- Eat jello shots. Shut up, jello is food. In fact, jello shots are food and alcohol mixed.
- Carve cooking out of my life since I will skip all real food and replace it with Jello shots. This is helpful since I don’t cook.
- Have a constant buzz. Easy to do when I’m not eating real food.
- Enjoy long nails and healthy hair. Jello has gelatin in it which is great for nails and hair.
- Drop any extra weight. Hell, Jello shots are portion controlled. And I think I could even use sugar free which has no calories. Obviously I’d double up on the alcohol since I need calories to survive. Duh.
- I’d never be hungry. Mainly because I could eat anywhere since these little molds travel well.
- I’d be more environmentally friendly by never using my dishwasher. I wouldn’t be using any silverware or dishes. Just those little paper/plastic cups. Fine, I use the recycled ones.
- I will have a lot more disposable income since I won’t need to eat out anymore.
That's me passing out this life changing tidbit at a party. J-E-L-L-O shots!
Here I am after enjoying these tasty treats along with my partner in crime, @h0neyb (Melissa). We had too much fun!
(Second photo is really small and I have no idea why.)
Wino Wednesday…this weekly feature is designed to share my wine alcohol related stories.
Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 at 11:19 am
Could those things get any more perkier???
Susan Mercedes Reply:
December 3rd, 2009 at 10:32 pm
who dat: They are pretty perfect. But to answer your question….technically they could be perkier, which would require me to double the size of the fake shit inside. It’s not in the cards…at least not today.
TMI I know.
Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 at 3:10 pm
I agree with “who dat”. Who’s looking at the jello shots or even reading this post?!
Susan Mercedes Reply:
December 3rd, 2009 at 10:33 pm
Becky: Just know that jello is a little more jiggly than the post distraction.
#totallyunintented
Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 at 3:16 pm
http://twitpic.com/qham5 <~For enlarged picture of me & you!!! :p
I'm such a good photographer!! (or your tits are perfect! Yeah I'll go with the 2nd:p)
I had so much fun with you! Glad we could meet up last moment! Oh I love your jugs.. I mean your "Jello Shoots"<~Still laughing!!!!!
Susan Mercedes Reply:
December 3rd, 2009 at 10:36 pm
@h0neyb: You’re a gem. It’s always fun seeing you. But even better when we can eat jello and make a regular night crazy fun! xo I nee to visit you in DC! I’ve never been there.
Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 at 4:00 pm
Does jello make your boobies grow too? Looks like it.
Susan Mercedes Reply:
December 3rd, 2009 at 10:36 pm
Suz: No. Jello does not make my boobies grow. My plastic surgeon made them grow. Fuck I love him!
Thursday, December 3rd 2009 at 6:24 am
hello, boobies.
Susan Mercedes Reply:
December 3rd, 2009 at 10:37 pm
kel: Likewise!
Saturday, December 5th 2009 at 11:09 am
Silicone is kind of a gelatinous substance, eh? Are those Jello shots fake or real? Hmmmm…..
Susan Mercedes Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 11:58 am
Carmen: They are so fake! Wait, no…they’re real…yummy. Never mind.