I attended one of those wine tasting events with a group of friends. We were all coupled up. Meaning, we all came with were with our significant others.

Back to the tasting. I always choose to swallow. It makes the most sense. Who wants to waste all that liquid goodness? And if you’re thinking that I’m referring to anything but the spit or swallow method in wine tasting, you’re wrong. Sick and wrong.

Swallowing that much wine leads to drunk. We were a big group of swallowers. And we became a big group of drunks.

Which naturally leads to continuing the party at one of the couple’s house. It was a great house. With plenty more wine. And a hot tub.

If you put together a bunch of swallowing drunks in a house with a hot tub, what do you get? A bunch of naked people in the hot tub. I’m sure you saw that coming. This was not a planned event for the evening, therefore none of us had swimsuits. Seriously, who brings a fucking swimsuit to a wine tasting event? Back to our brilliant plan. We all strip down. Yep, get naked. And jump in.

So we squished around in the hot tub for a bit. We continued drinking. Finally we decided we had enough wet fun. Luckily there were plenty of towels.

We got out. We dried off. We sat on the couches wrapped in towels by the fire. And what did I do?

I fucking fall asleep. Remember, falling asleep is something I do. I fell asleep sitting up on the couch wrapped in my towel.

Time passes. And I wake up.

Everyone is still in the room. It looks normal as I scope out the crowd. Until I realize that I’m the only one completely butt ass naked.

Suddenly the hot tub idea seems like a dumb one.

Please tell me that this has happened to you!

Wino Wednesday…this weekly feature is designed to share my wine related stories.

Simple enough.

To make it even more fun, I like to body surf the waves. So that’s what I did.  But with the excitement, there is a downside.

Ocean waves are powerful. Playing in them can cause unexpected wardrobe malfunctions. Clearly I’m not new to these as you may remember from my peep show post earlier this week.

From experience yesterday, I learned that it is very easy to lose your bikini bottoms to your ankles and for your tightly tied halter bikini top to shift. Both happened. Many times.

But come to find out, this is common in San Diego. Check out what Kelli did this weekend. At least I’m in good company.

What I learned: no amount of wardrobe tape could have kept my nipples covered or kept my bottoms on. So sometimes you just need to be grateful for having tanned boobs and a tanned bum. And I am.

When do you like to do it?

I’m sure you know what I’m talking about…your best thinking. If you thought something else, you’re perverted. That, of course, makes me like you more.

Aside from the shower, I also tend to do my best thinking while blow drying my hair. Again,  both activities are done naked. Always. These thoughts are often about my work. 

I do my best blog thinking while I’m driving. Obviously, I’m always clothed while doing this activity.

I do most of my general life/relationship thinking while drinking. This is a toss up on whether I’m naked or clothed. 

Do you find it strange that my conservative thinking for work is done when I’m most exposed (i.e. naked)? I do. 

Where do you do your best thinking?

Self photos…we all have taken them. Why do we do it? Well here’s one reason why I do it. If I’m wearing a gift I received, I will send the person who gave it to me a quick photo as proof that I love the gift. When I say gift, I mean clothing & jewelry. I don’t strategically place the gifted iPhone dock on my torso and snap a photo and hit send. That would be silly.

There are also rare instances when I have sent “intimate” self photos to someone who has seen me in person the same way. When I say intimate, I mean naked. More specifically, topless. Beaver shots are not my thing.

As a new trick, I recently learned how to send photos over IM. It’s easy. Simply drag the photo over to the IM window and hit enter. If you’ve ever IM’ed…the pace is fast. Typos are common. Capitalization and punctuation isn’t always perfect. You’re in a mad race to get your thoughts out just like you would if you were sitting across from the person talking. There is no “recall” feature. Once it is sent, it is done. This translates to mistakes.

I had two darling intimate photos I wanted to send to someone. We happened to be chatting over IM. Remember how simple it is? Select picture, drag to IM window, drop picture there, hit enter. Done. So easy.

It may be important to note here that I was chatting with 3 people all in different windows on this particular evening. It is also very easy to drop the picture in the WRONG IM window.  

The rest of my IM chats went something like this:

Me:

Fuck.

Don’t look at my last message.

Please don’t.

I sent you a picture meant for _____’s eyes.

Fuck.

Him:

Okay. I won’t look. I’ll delete it.

[Changing windows]

Me (to the guy who I MEANT to send it to):

Fuck. I just sent photo #2 to someone else.

Him:

Was it a guy?

Me:

Yes.

Him:

He’ll love it.

Although I can’t guarantee that this photo was loved by anyone, I can assure you that I am much more careful on IM now.  Shocking my male friends with those types of pictures is SO wrong on so many levels.